Hi, my name is Samantha. [Everyone in unison, now...."Hi Samantha."]
I’m 32, single and have no kids [SWNK].
Typical responses tend to be: “Why aren’t you married? You’re too sweet! You’re so pretty. But you’re so good with kids!”
{Permission to roll your eyes, granted.}
My inward response, accompanying the clinching of my jaw through a forced smile is something like, “Don’t you think if I knew what the problem was, I’d fix it?” My hunch is that if you are over 18 and SWNK you not only relate to these feelings but have experienced these seemingly condescending verbal “pat-on-the-backs,” too.
Perhaps the grace has worn off, my hope has run out and disappointment has rendered me jaded. But the married well-meaners attempting to make me feel normal for being SWNK has become downright hurtful. Years of these comments have dragged me down and dampened what faith I do have. Not only that, but it turns me off from wanting to engage in any conversation about marriage or my desire for it. Including conversations with the Lord.
Honestly, I will do just about anything to avoid talking about how I dream of marriage. And not just the fairy tale part, because I’m a realist. I’ve dated. I’ll leave the rainbow connection to the dreamers, lovers and Kermit. Bring on the nitty-gritty, can’t-stand-your-face much less the-way-you-breathe stuff. Because on the flip side of that is the nitty-gritty, can’t-stand-life-without-you stuff.
All but 3.5 of my friends are married, so ask me anything about marriage and I’ll probably know the answer. Now don’t get me wrong — I really do love hearing stories, but I long to be able to share my marriage stories in return. So I compare myself with those who are married. What do they have that I don’t? Why them and not me? What have I done that exempts me from marriage? Why aren’t I married? Why?
Just recently God took extreme measures to speak to me about my marriage doubts, fear, hopes and dreams for a family. He literally had to take me around the world, to the country of El Salvador, to present me with some truth He’d been trying to tell me for years, but I wouldn’t listen.
At the end of the week on the way to the airport, out of the blue my friend, Brad, started talking with me about marriage. My guard went up. I didn’t want to defend the “why” questions. But this conversation was different. It was as if the Lord gave Brad x-ray vision into the deep recesses of my heart.
“It haunts you, doesn’t it? It keeps you up at night. Wondering why. ‘Why aren’t I married? What’s wrong with me?’ I know, because it once haunted me, too.”
I wanted to deflect this conversation, and the hurt built up from the years of unanswered “whys.” Yes, my thoughts haunt me. But then God used five little words to wash them and the pain and doubts away.
“There’s nothing wrong with you.”
At that moment, “trapped” in a conversation I didn’t ask for on a bus halfway across the globe, all the “whys” were left voiceless from one simple voice of truth…His truth. Years of frustrated heartache and wondering sleepless nights were washed away.
That is the same message I share today, with you. Girl, there is nothing wrong with you. You are okay. Better than okay, just as you are. You don’t have to be funnier, cuter, quieter, trendier, spiritualer. Rather than defending yourself from other people’s whys and your own personal questions, I encourage you to let those five words fight for you as they did for me. If for no other reason, because they are true. There is nothing wrong with you.
Resources…
Song of Solomon 4:7, “There is no flaw in you.” (NIV)
Now and Not Yet: Making Sense of Single Life in the Twenty-First Century by Jennifer Marshall
Something Else…
Sam’s perfect day would be hanging with friends while serving the Lord (preferably overseas!), drinking Antigua coffee and kicking it to bluegrass, sweet worship or Lecrae. Throw in a game of ultimate Frisbee, a captivating read, and some lemon/raspberry bars and she’s in heaven! For more musings, visit http://fieldsgold.blogspot.com/
Have you struggled with similar thoughts? Leave Sam a note here.
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thanks for this encouragement. i am 21 never dated not married, single. This is a great reminder. Awesome bible verse choice.
“There is nothing wrong with you”- AMEN to that!
Though I do not know what it is like to be single and over 18, or even 20 since I’m married. I can definitely relate to the pressure of others. Now that I am married, I am always being asked about when I will have kids. My husband and I are nowhere ready at 23 years old. Financially, and mentally. Emotionally yes, but there needs to be a balance. So it is hard to see others our age having kids, and I sometimes feel jealous, and say the very same question you are saying, “WHY NOT ME?”
But I have to remember that there isn’t anything wrong with me. And if kids are in God’s will, He has his very own time line for me. So enough with competing with other people’s standards!
Thank you for the encouragement!
Thanks for sharing this. I have felt this way countless times before but how wonderful to be reminded that “nothing is wrong with me.”
Blessings,
e.
Thank you so much for that. I will confess that my situation is different from yours but I can relate in so may ways. You see, I’m 27 years old, and separated from my husband (practically divorced). I ask what’s wrong with me all the time, why did he leave me for someone else. What does she have that I’m missing. And honestly I’ve never really dated either. I met my husband right after high school and we “dated” for 6 years before we finally got married. He is the only guy I ever dated and it scares me to think that I may never get my dream of a husband and children. It’s pretty apparent now that our marriage isn’t going to work, he stopped working on it long ago, the 21st of this month would be our 3 year anniversary. He is still living another life and lying about it. Never in a million years would I have thought him capable of that and neither did anyone else that knows him. So now I ask the same question, “What’s wrong with me” and “will I ever find love again?”
God has been challenging me to step outside my comfort zone and really rely on him. I put my husband first, unconsciously, and I think God has been teaching me that only He can give me what I really need. He has been pushing me and stretching me, and growing me these past several months in ways that had this terrible thing not happened, I’m not sure I would have grown like that. So although I wish I could have learned these lessons a little different, I get reminders, like today, saying there is nothing wrong with you and I’m still growing you!!
Thanks for that beautiful reminder!!! And I believe that God gives us our dreams, that’s why he had us dream them to begin with, we just have to be patient! Another lesson that he continues to teach me!!
Hope you have a blessed day, thanks again!
With Love,
Bethany
Hi girls…thanks so much for sharing! It’s neat that I had prayed that those 5 words would bless people at all levels and with any reason for asking “what’s wrong with me.”
Keep checking back this week…there’ll be more encouragement (I think from my friend Brad).
Saying a prayer right now for each of you!
<3, Sam
Thank you so much. I am single (divorced) with kids. I have tried many times to reconcile with my ex. Ended in more pain each time. I certainly needed to hear that God does not think anything is wrong with me. I beat myself up all the time. So, thank you.
I am drying my tears right now. I can’t express just how badly I needed to hear this because I have been struggling with this issue lately. I will be 40 next month, SWNK (never married). I was engaged at the time I accepted Christ at age 30 but we broke up 2 months later. I have been happily single, growing in the Lord, trusting Him to bring someone into my life if that is His plan. (I just need to stop right now & thank God for a mother who feels the same way – she has never pressured me where marriage or children are concerned.) I also need to say that I don’t mind being childless & have never had a burning desire for children. That’s always fun to try to explain. I usually get a look of real horror with that one! I like my friend’s children but I’m realistic & motherhood is just not my gifting! Back to the single part. I am not the most outgoing person & I started to realize just how isolated I had become. Last fall, the Lord led me to step out & join in some church activities that I had previously avoided. I started meeting new people & God has helped me to blossom into a person that I never knew I could be; all the old shyness & self-consciousness has fallen away & I find that people actually like being around me (why does that surprise us?). A few weeks ago, I was introduced to a very cute, 35 yr old SWNK thru a mutual friend & one of the first things he said was “You haven’t dated in 9 years? What’s wrong with you?” Are you kidding? Now you know why this post got to me! Never did it occur to me to ask him the same question! I told him what about getting saved & that God has been my priority. We talked on the phone a couple times & seemed to hit it off as friends. I know, that question he asked should have made me go slam with the receiver, but I chose to laugh it off & go on. We went to a movie soon after. Again, we got along great, had a lot of laughs. He even said that the next time we hang out, blah, blah, blah; I’ll call you, yada, yada, yada. I haven’t heard from him since. The feelings of rejection have almost overwhelmed me. I asked myself the dreaded question that he had asked me. I even asked God why He would show me what’s possible only to snatch it away (I love that He allows us to vent to Him)! I’ve had to do some mirror preaching, telling myself those five sweet words “There’s nothing wrong with you!” Despite the hurt, I’m determined to keep trusting God no matter what – this has not been easy but that doesn’t mean it’s not possible. I tell myself that the sooner I let this go & put it behind me, the sooner another door will open. Thank you so, so much for this!
I’m turning 33 this year and have struggled with this same question but sadly for me I’m going through a divorce after only 2 yrs of marriage. I married a man that said I had it all a man could ever want, yet he left me. Then I made the mistake of dating someone else during the divorce, he told me he had never had it better, yet he left me too. It’s difficult to not think there is something wrong with me when the last two men who said I was the best thing, left. Everyone tells me that they can’t believe their reasoning for leaving me, that I’m a good woman, have a career, attractive, family values, etc. Now I’m working on just working on my relationship with God and learning and accepting that to God, there is nothing wrong with me. I know God may have taken me out of these relationships for a very good reason! I feel he was looking out for me yet I still struggle thinking there is something wrong with me. I know in time, God will reveal to me the areas that do need changing but I know he will help me see the great things about me too.
31 years old. Hardly dated at all. One long unhealthy relationship in late 20s. That’s it. Actually going on vacation just to get away from the constant reminders of the hurt and feelings of forgottenness. It still hurts but thanks. the sting lessens knowing I am not alone with the unanswered “whys”.
So well said. SO well said. By experiencing this, you’ve fought the good fight on the behalf of other SWNK. Bring it, girl, bring it. I’ve been single for so long that the idea that I’m messed up in some way has seeped into my heart. It’s probably a combination of not realizing what was sneaking its way into my heart and allowing it to do so. Whatever the case, this composition has reminded me of the opposition I don’t have to accept, live with, etc. “The Marrieds” aren’t the enemy – it’s just that THE enemy does realize a good opportunity for his distortion, discouragement, and dis-add-your-word-here.
I like your grit. It is a genuine gift from God.
Yep! I have thought the very same thing. What is wrong with me? Is it my weight? my personally? I can’t tell you the number of times I have thought about this. I have spent just as many hours dreaming of what it would be like to find a husband and to have children of my own. Sometimes I feel terrible, because I feel like I’m questioning God and His plans for me. But deep down, I believe and trust God that he has it worked out already. I keep telling myself, “it’s just not my time yet.” As I type that I cry because I so badly want it to be my time for all that. My heart aches for the chance to have someone love me because that want to and not because they have to.
I enjoyed reading your devotion. Jennifer
Thank you so much for sharing with us Sam. It took a lot not to sob while I was reading this (I was at work, so it wouldn’t have been pretty!) My whole life my greatest desire has been to be a wife and mother. I have never wanted a career (although I am a teacher and LOVE my profession) or anything more. In high school, my friends would talk about their dream jobs, and I would talk about being a wife. And now, at 25, most of my friends are married or in serious relationships (some with children), and I am the only one who is single and childless. It is actually hard for me to be around them at times, because it is a constant hurtful reminder of where I am in my life.For years, the question has been “what is wrong with me?” I have been convinced that I am defective. It is hard for me to hear “oh, you’re young-you’ll find someone” when in my heart I don’t fully believe that is true. Lately, it has been a struggle to even talk to God about it, mostly because I feel like He has far greater things to worry about, and I’m not always sure He wants to fufill those desires. I feel like my singleness is a punishment, or a confirmation that I am defective, and how could any man want (and no one would deserve) someone who is defective. I am always thinking of ways to improve myself because I think maybe if I was funnnier, thinner, or spent more time with God I would be desirable. Reading this blog made me realize that I am not alone in this, and it is an intense struggle for so many of us, even if the situation isn’t necessairly the same. Lately I have really been seeking the Truth in my life, and this blog was like God speaking to me in my brokeness. Thank you so much for sharing with us, and reading our comments as well. God bless you!
Wow. I don’t even know what to say. I’m 39, never married, no kids, and yet the dream lives on in my heart. Just today I asked God, “What’s wrong with me, that others seem to find that one person, and I haven’t?” People tell me that I am attractive. I am successful. I love God with all my heart. And yet satan still has me doubting myself!
Thank you for being faithful and sharing your experience. I asked God a question, and He has answered through you.
To all the other women out there who feel the same… do not believe satan’s lies! If you have experienced rejection it is not because there is something wrong with you! It is because God’s answer was no. You were created by God, for His purpose, and he is faithful to see that through!
In prayer for all of us….
Kristen
AMEN!! 30 about to be 31 SWNK. I couldn’t have said it better. I get the questions you mentioned almost daily from patients I work with! I even had one tell me “Well, you’ll never get married now.” after I told him that I recently purchased my own house!
I have wondered many nights what is wrong with me that I’m not married like all my other friends? And what is God’s purpose for me as a single woman. I know there is NOTHING wrong with me! Now to find how God wants me to best serve in my single capacity!
Thank you for sharing. I use to think something was wrong with me because I have dated the frog before prince charming. I have not had the joy of dating a normal guy,so now I am more afraid of marriage but yet do not want to be SWNK forever. So I have been praying that God heal my heart and change my view on marriage.
If perfection was the requirement for marriage, no one would be married, Some of the most spectacular women I know are single. The single woman who wrote this is spectacular. All the best to all the single ladies, my prayers are with you!
“There’s nothing wrong with you” … what affirmation! Thanks for writing this. I respect you so much.
Whoa, what an amazing post. Thank you for the affirmations. I do believe it, I just have to be reminded of it. It’s an encouragement to me because I feel the very same way…I love this site and the encouragement I get through this site and it’s beautiful women involved. Maybe one day I can work in a ministry to help women realize their worth in GOD’S EYES! <3
I turned 33 this year, have never been married & have no children. I too have always had a deep desire to be married & have children-since I was a little girl, that is what I dreamed about. It seems that over the years, less people ask me why or make me feel abnormal for still being single-that I am very thankful for. The worst was having both my YOUNGER sisters get married at age 20 & 21.
I know that God IS in control, even though I have to remind myself often. Thanks for this reminder!
Each day I choose to continue to trust that God has everything under control-even though I don’t like his timetable. I’m blessed that He has given me 4 nephews & 1 niece that my sisters allow me to spend LOTS of time spoiling-& then send them home so I can sleep all night
I am 36, single, almost all friends of mine say I am pretty, nice & sweet
… I know that NOTHING’S WRONG WITH ME… I am now working for HIM in full time ministry… women’s ministry, in the largest muslim country in the world… and I feel content 
God is just sooo good to me…
Oh ya, I’m praying to get married to someday… So i believe, now is my preparation time…
You are just so precious ladies… To God be all the glory
As I was reading this, I am reminded of my singleness. I am almost 40, divorced and a single mom. I also ask the same question constantly “what is wrong with me”. I sometimes feel like I’m not good enough and wonder if it’s my weight or because I wear glasses most of the time and don’t really wear much makeup anymore or fix up my hair like I used to because I feel that guys don’t like me either way. They’re only nice to me because I am a nice and sweet person but I guess that’s just not enough and feel that guys only want a girl for their looks, not their personality. I dream of the day when I will someday find someone who really is compatible and thought I found someone recently but it all seems to be coming out as sounding like he is a romantic scammer online and it has left me distrusting men even more. I don’t want to stay single the rest of my life and want to meet someone and grow old with him but there doesn’t appear to be anyone who is single that would be interested. It seems like all the men my age just aren’t available and are married or are in a relationship and the ones who are out there don’t want a committment or aren’t living a good Christian life. Sometimes I say to myself it’s just not fair that other couples are happily married and my marriage went sour and now I’m single and want someone to spend time with and laugh about things or do things together. I always find myself going to a restaurant or a movie by myself when it’s not with my kids and sometimes I’m okay but sometimes I feel so lonely and wonder when will the right person come along. Sometimes I don’t think anyone will ever come along and will remain single for the rest of my life. My kids will someday grow up and move out and I will be left alone with no one to do things with and don’t really have much friends or they’re married and really don’t want to spend much time with someone who is single. Sometimes I do ask myself why me? Why can’t I find someone? What did I do wrong? I am really that unattractive?
From a 39yo male, never married, with no children…..thank you.
Sweet friends….thank YOU for sharing your thoughts, struggles, doubts, fears and triumphs. It means so much to me.
The Lord has me in Malachi 3:6 lately….it says, “I the Lord do not change, therefore you…are not consumed.”
My prayer out of that verse is that we will cling to the solid, steadfast nature of our God and His truth and promises, and look to Him, rather than to our circumstances and pain. So they don’t devour us. Difficult? Yes. Worth it. Definitely. Necessary. No doubt.
I say this not to be trite, but because it’s our lifeline when the storms come. I’m anchoring myself down with this truth…hope you’ll join me in doing the same.
Thanks again friends
I married for all the wrong reasons. I wanted children so when I was 32 I married someone I didn’t love. I became some what like a battered wife and suffered horribly for doing my will and not God’s. My only daughter wants nothing to do with me and after 22 years of working on my marriage I finaly have love for my husband and what is really profound is God took me to El Salvador for a year to purge me and now I have 2 sponsored children who bring me great joy. He is so merciful and long suffering. I have many divorced christian friends and they love being single! God is truly are husband!
As I continue to read these posts, I am encouraged. Knowing that I’m not the only woman over 30 still single is reassuring. Another one of the devil’s lies-”you’re the only 30 something still single”. Not true!!
Wow, I am so happy I came back to see other comments to this post. Though my earlier post was not related to being single, but that even when married, the world has expectations too that can be so hard. But wow, I commend all you ladies for the strength you have, and the trust in God’s plan for you! You all are so amazing! God bless you all!
God directed me to your site in an amazing way. I read my devotions online and 2 days ago they wouldn’t update to the current day. I decided to search Chrisianity.com for something to feed my soul and found you. I’m 30 and single with a child. I’m longing to meet someone that would make a good husband and a dad. I struggle with the thought that Christian guys aren’t attracted to me. Before my child was born, I spent a lot of time hanging out at clubs. I never had a hard time meeting men when I was dancing and had a drink in my hand. The problem is, I never met anyone that had a commitment to God. The type of guys I was dating resulted in becoming a single mom left to make it on my own. Luckily, I’ve got a wonderful family that has stepped up to help. Sometimes satan tempts me to go back to my old ways to meet someone, after all, it worked “so well” before. I not only have to pray that God brings me a man, but a Godly man and to not settle (or make excuses for) anyone else! Satan is great at grabbing on to this weakness and steering us wrong. God has blessed my life in so many other ways. I try to focus on those, but it really helped to hear the words “there’s nothing wrong with you” when I was really needing them the most. Thank you!
Sam I want to thank you for this. I actually stumbled upon your post after listening to Brad’s vlog. I just have to say that my story is different than most on here, I am single mother of three that has never been married. I have been told many times that God is sending someone and I have even been prophesied over that God was sending two and that I would have to discern the right one. The thing that haunts me is that my children tell me everyday how much they want a daddy. It is so hard to hear your kids tell you this and wonder if the day will ever come when their dream will come true. I do want to thank you for sharing your story. It means a lot to a woman like me.
Sam,
You are completely amazing.
Wow! I am blown away at y’alls stories and what the Lord is doing in each of your lives. Though many of our walks are different, the emotions are nearly the same.
Hoping each of you get to check out Brad’s vlog. And through that truth, the Lord will continue to restore what the doubt/hurt and loneliness have stolen.
Thank you for opening up and for your honesty. I’m encouraged!! Keeping you all in my prayers,
Sam
Thanks for this! I’m only 20 but I struggle with the whole “what’s wrong w/ me thing”. I started dating as a freshman in high school and I’ve always had some type of boyfriend. The past two years I’ve been in two serious relationships. One had another girlfriend and left me for her the same day I found out about her; the other, just left out of nowhere. People constantly say I could have any guy I wanted, but that’s so false. It’s been seven months since the last guy broke up with me and I still want to be back in his life. I always wonder why these guys left. What’s wrong with me? It sounds pathetic and dramatic, especially being with my age. But these break ups hurt me far worse than I ever thought possible, and has lead me to a dark rut of thoughts and hurt that I cannot seem to get out of. Thanks for this awesome reminder!
Thank you so much for the encouraging story! I’m 21 and never dated I was so encouraged to hear I’m not alone!
Great message! Kate, I can so relate to your dreams and desires to be a wife and mom. I grew up the same way of thinking and teaching is the next best thing to being a mommy. (I ended up in the field of early childhood) I know God has a plan for you and he is working in your life at this very moment for your good and his glory!
I never really “dated” more than 1 man and we married right after high school. To this day I doubt myself for how quickly I entered into marriage, although I love my husband, God has certainly worked in our relationship through many trials. Some days I wish I had the opportunity to experience single life, to discover myself before I became someone’s wife and mother. Marriage and children are a complicated journey with many ups and downs. The desire for these things is natural and part of God’s plan for us, in his timing as we seek him above all else. I pray that God blesses each of you with peace that he is taking care of your future!
I applaud you who have the ‘luxury’ of being single and able to focus only on the Lord and not distracted by the demands there are in marriage and children. Enjoy your time with Him!
Sam,
Thank you for this honest and real message. Your words express the heart of so many women, and I just love how your story shows God’s patience had run out. He had a Truth He wanted to teach you that you were not receiving. So He took you to another part of the world and used a most unlikely person to speak what was on His heart to you. Praising God for His faithfulness to meet you in your hurt and send a healing balm to soothe it. No, He did not “fix” it or make it better. He began a transformational process in your heart to point you to Truth.
I’ve known you for several years, sweet friend, and you are beautiful inside and out…plus so very bright and gifted. We at Proverbs 31 are blessed to have you and love you very much!!
Thankful for you,
Wendy
Wow… THERE S NOTHING WRONG WITH YOU…AND ME! That s an incredible statement,…rather a re-affirmation of GOD s enduring love for you and me. Everyday,the more i let Him love me… He assures me am WORTHY…! THANKS for the reminder,sister… God bless ya : )
Bethany,
Your story broke my heart and caused me to pray for you. Thank you for being so transparent with people you will never know and possibly never meet until Heaven. It’s a beautiful thing when the Lord brings his “girls” together in a unified family to love, laugh, and cry together. God’s working in your life, even though it hurts, and is making you into the person he wants you to be, even though you might forget it sometimes.
I want to encoruage you with the verse that is currently kicking my butt into gear. Jeremiah 29:11. It was given to the Isrialites when they were in a painful time in exile in Babylon. They were confused, hurt, and just waiting for things to return to normal. But God told them to be okay with the situation they were in, and in fact to contribute to the society in which they belonged in a lasting way even though the situation was temporary. Because He knew his plans for them and they were to weed out the unbelievers and strengthen those who were devoted to Him. He was planning on blessing them in his time with gifts that a loving father gives to his children that last for eternity.
So I pray that Stength and Love and Encouragement would surround you in amazing ways that leave you in awe of his blessings. And I pray that you will be able to continue to trust that He knows his plans for your life.
Thank you for your post. You are an incredibly strong woman and it’s been an encouragement in my day to hear your story.
Katie,
But I am reminded often that he has bigger plans then even I can imagine.
Thank you for your kind and reassuring words!! It means a lot to me. And thank you for sharing Jeremiah 29:11, I think God is kicking a lot of our butts with it!!
For the first time, I am seeing God work while he is working instead of after he has finished. I am recognizing him in ways that I haven’t before. I can’t say that every day is full of joy or that I never ask why because I still do, but the point is that I know there is a plan whether I know what it is or not and I know God is taking care of me. And it helps to receive encouraging words from sweet people like you!
Here are a few verses that God has been sharing with me this week. I share these with you and anyone else that has struggled or become frustrated by the question why…1 Peter 5:10 The God of all grace, who called you to his eternal glory in Christ, after you have suffered a little while, will himself restore you and make you strong, firm and steadfast. Proverbs 16:3, Isaiah 43:18-19, Joel 2:25, and Psalm 51:12.
I hope these verses will encourage and bless you like they have me. And I thank you for your encouragement and pray that you would continue to bless others with God’s words!!
Thank you!!!
With and abundance of Love,
Bethany
I came across this a few weeks ago and got a blog on my phone. As I sit in my bed tonight reading all the encouraging words and to know and realize that I’m ok and there’s nothing wrong with me, continues to let me know that God is speaking life to me! Thank you ladies so much for the words of encouragement and the scriptures as well. I have been single for the past 11 years, with a few dates here and there, but nothing serious. I have been enjoying my singleness and have developed in my career as well. But there is a longing, and a desire in me to become a mother and to live my life with my husband. God continues to tell me how he has the best for me, but I don’t see it, and many times I feel lonely and sad. But now i understand that There is Nothing wrong with me! Thank you so much! Continue to pray for me as I do for this ministry!
I have been asking the whys this last few days. Feeling numb from the brain down. Even saw a rainbow and couldn’t bring myself to enjoy the moment. Came to a realization that what I thought God was giving me hope, was in fact a false hope. Don’t know where God was at all now. What’s the use of hoping when in the end it will lead to to a barren place and empty dreams? What promises do you see when you read those verses? What does He restore you to be?
Blah Blah Blah, Deep down I know the answers to those questions and I know that I am just having a self-pity party. I will look at those verses and hopefully, they will enlighten me and break the dark clouds so I can be myself again.
Melinda
Wow… now this is the reason why I love women’s ministry! Where all the sisters from around the world get connected, encourage each other and know that we are never alone and we are loved! Thank you all for sharing, caring & loving…
God is so good all the time!
All the time God is so good…
Love y’all….
Melinda,
As hard as it may be, try to let go and enjoy the journey your on!!
I don’t know if you were really looking for any answers or you were just venting, but I wanted to tell you something. First of all, it’s alright to vent, as a matter of fact it’s important to vent and you should share those thoughts with God. Let him know that you are frustrated and feeling hopeless. One thing he will tell you is that there is no such thing as false hope (Not when your Hope is in God). There is such a thing as hoping in the wrong things though. If we put our hope in God then we will never be let down, but we often make the mistake of putting out hope in things or people. Things will not give us hope or reassurance and people will falter and let us down, but God never will and he tells you to continue putting your hope in him!!
Something good to remember is that even when you are feeling like you’ve entered into a dark hole of emptiness, God is still there with you and he will pull you out of it. He can and will use everything for the greater good. I’ve been where you are, and I hated it, but that was also the same time that God was drawing me near to him and telling me that I needed to stop putting my hope and faith in other things, that He is the only one who won’t let me down and He has always taken care of me through everything. It is hard to see that when we anticipate something else coming our way and then find out that things didn’t turn out the way we thought they would. But just bacause they didn’t turn out the way we thought, doesn’t mean that there isn’t something wonderful in store for us, it just means it’s different than we thought. So prepare yourself for something wonderful!!!!
Well I hope this helps. It’s alright to get upset, but the thing we have to remember is not to stay there. So let it all out, give it all up to God and then take your first step forward toward the beautiful wonder of what God has for you!!! He loves you, cares about you, accepts you, and has a plan for you!!!!
Jeremiah 29:11 “For I know the plans I have for you, declares the Lord, plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future. Dwell on that for a little while and revel in the wonders God has for you!!
I hope you have a blessed week and I will be praying for you!!
With Love,
Bethany
To Bethany and all,
That was a wonderful response I was not expecting! you are right indeed! It was a vent and to say there is no such thing as false hope in Him was a light bulb moment. How did I forget THAT??? LOL I am doing much better so I have not stayed in an upset state. Satan had convinced me that God was not interested in my heart. This past week I have come to realize I was putting my hope in the wrong things! Still not really sure WHAT I put my hope in…actually, maybe it wasn’t that it was in the wrong things, perhaps misguided? Hmmm. I need to ponder on that later. We women are great at convincing ourselves of things not true, right? I have to really start buckling down and applying what you said to my life again. Somehow I have forgotten God’s promises and assurance as i have been lost in my own flesh. That said, I am still receiving much comfort rereading these posts. Thanks Sam for keeping it up and allowing us to continue to meet each others’ needs.
Thanks Bethany!
I will thank God for you all in my prayers.
Melinda