the need to be known

Two things have happened to me recently that have made me realize something about myself. It has to do with a need I apparently have.

Several weeks ago, I spent some time with an old and dear friend. I was speaking for an event, and after it was over she decided to come back to my hotel room with me to hang out, eat burgers on the bed, and enjoy girl talk. Mid-bite and in the midst of our conversation, she stopped, stared at me and asked, “Lisa, where are your glasses?” The friend of my youth, who hadn’t seen me for more than a few years, remembered that I was virtually blind as a bat and required corrective wear since the 6th grade. What she didn’t know was that 4 years prior, I had gotten LASIK surgery. All she remembered was this detail in our history together.

A few weeks later, I received an email from someone I love. In it, he offered me encouragement about a large task I was currently undertaking. He talked about the fact that I work well under pressure, and that he knew that I would rise to the occasion and get it all done, despite my initial scrambling.

The interesting thing about these two occurrences that seem to have no connection is the way they made me feel. They solidified something in my heart that I have never really taken the time to understand.

I have the need to be known by someone.

Now, please don’t misunderstand. This may not be in the context you first assume; because my need is not to be known by the world or in a fame kind of way. Rather, my need is to be known by someone in the sense that we have a rich history of trust, love and understanding with each other. My need is to be known by someone who sees my quirks, gets my personality, and remembers the details about my life. This need is not met by acquaintances or passing romances, but rather it requires the time, effort and care of a true friend.

Some of us have enjoyed the privilege of this type of relationship. Others of us have not. Some of us have had mothers, sisters, relatives, girlfriends and significant others who we have felt known by. Others of us have walked the earth feeling very alone, relegated to our private thoughts, feelings and dreams.

But all of us stand equal-footed in one respect – we all have the ability to be known by the great lover of our soul, Jesus Christ. There is not a quirk He doesn’t smile about. There is not a personality He rejects. There is not a detail He doesn’t remember. He is the knowing God of all of His creation, and that includes His intimate knowledge of exactly who you are.

Yes, it is precious to feel known by someone you love. And yes, it feels good to be remembered and understood. But the richest of earthly relationships can never replace our deepest desires to be known and loved, from the inside out. And only One person can provide that level of intimacy.

Even when you don’t feel it, He sees you.

Even when you don’t believe it, He knows you.

Even when you don’t understand it, you are His beloved.

These are the thoughts I leave you with today. Rest in them, dear friend, for you are known by God.

Resources…

The Bible

Psalm 119:168b: “…all my ways are known to you.”

Behind Those Eyes: What’s Really Going on Inside the Souls of Women by Lisa Whittle

Something Else…

Take this week’s quiz to evaluate your need to be known.

Lisa Whittle knows herself enough to know that cooking is not her best talent. She shouldn’t ever go without wearing bangs, and she usually does things the hard way. But she also knows that her personality is no mistake, so she goes with it Visit her at www.lisawhittle.com.

Share with Lisa this week in the comments.